Attraction

Questioner: Acharya Ji, whenever any conflict arises between myself and the ones I am attached to, why does it hurt me?

Acharya Prashant: It is because we don’t comprehend the nature of duality, so we want to have one side of duality while trying to avoid the other side. And…

Questioner: What is the role of persuasion in teaching? Is it alright if teaching involves a certain degree of persuasion? If yes, why must one be persuaded?

Acharya Prashant: ‘Law of attraction’, all such stuff is based on the premise that you know what is worthy enough to be attracted to. Who are you to know that? Do you really know that? And if you really knew that, would you really want to attract something? Wouldn't you

If a drunkard were to use the law of attraction, what would he deem suitable to attract to himself? A huge truckload of beer. He would keep fantasizing of beer companies and such things, and maybe that materializes also. And if that materializes, it is even worse for the drunkard,

Questioner (Q): Acharya Ji, there are different planes of love possible – mental, spiritual, physical. But somehow, to me, they seem different. It may be because that I have been raised this way that I intertwine these two – mental and physical plane. And that is how I come to

Gynaecology is psychology. Where else does the whole thing come from? And it’s not as if I am talking exclusively of women; with the men it’s just the same.

The evil can consume you in two ways. One is, you look at evil and you find it beautiful. Some people do; they are captivated by the sheer charm of evil. Aren’t the dons in the movies sometimes very charming? In fact, the most charming characters in the movies in…

When the woman is not in front of you, do you keep fantasizing about her all the time? This is mental illness. Only if you are indulging in all kinds of sexual fantasies and inner perversion will you jump upon her at the first sight. Otherwise, there is hardly anything

Men and women are different; their biologies make them different. But what we have is a hyper genderization, a hyper sexualization. The differences are there, but little. Society has hyper-inflated those differences. The woman has been turned into a hyper-woman, and the man has been turned into a hyper-man. And

I am saying this as a friend of the woman. I am asking her, why is the male sight or the male gaze so important to you? If you want attention from people, if you want respect from people, why can’t it be for higher reasons? Why do you want

If you take yourself as primarily physical, then beauty too for you would be something just physical. You will look at the woman most capable of successfully reproducing. That’s the

It is not so much about attracting somebody beautiful to yourself or about obtaining a beautiful mate in your life. It is more about knowing what beauty really is. Depending on your definition of beauty, you will choose your relationships, you will choose everything in life. Because life, in one

The quality of your love depends on the quality of your life. Your love affair cannot be a sublime thing if your life is mired in littleness.

If a woman is good and fine, then her lover or husband would spoil her. Women must be honored for her intelligence, her qualities, for her inner strength. But when you start giving her importance for reasons like, her body is attractive and she is very sexually appealing, then you

Women like burly guys—and why do they like burly, big, and muscular guys? Because they are likely to have higher levels of testosterone. Unless you have testosterone, you cannot build muscles; you know that, right? And that is why you cannot build muscles, let’s say, after fifty or sixty. It’s

I understand, we live in a society, we are related to each other, we will have something to do with the other. You will always have some relationship with the other. But why can’t that relationship be on healthier grounds? Why must the two be related because they appreciate each

False love is very lucrative, very charming. Oh, there is such a romance around it! But then, that romance is hardly love.

You do not need to wait for your encounters with women to know whether or not you are sexually motivated. Just see whether leather seats attract you. Just see whether furniture and garments and carpets and upholstery and wall-hangings and curtains and sofa sets attract you. Just see whether you…

Real love is always tough. False love is very lucrative, very charming—oh, there is such a romance around it. But then, that romance is hardly love.

If you are someone who is a serial relater—one relationship after the other or several relationships at a time, whatever, it is one and the same thing really—you must tell yourself that you really have not a physical but a spiritual urge. And therefore, you should stop your mad, nonsensical

Hold on. There will be temptations; old habits, old environments will beckon you, but stand still and strong. Don’t give up. It’s a battle worth fighting and worth winning. Don’t lose this one.

You are saying that you step out and you look at the opposite sex and feel attracted, and you are calling it a problem. To deal with the problem, first of all, there must be a problem. The man is charming—how is that a problem? The woman is beautiful and

Questioner (Q): What is attachment?

Many of us promise our parents high marks, and when the result falls short, the guilt can feel heavier than the exam itself. But no one controls results; they depend on far too many things outside us. What is in our hands is our intent, our effort and our honesty with what we study. The Bhagavad Gita says the same: our right is to action alone, never to its fruit. What if the only promise we made was to study honestly and with love?

Sisyphus pushes a rock up a hill forever, knowing it will always roll back down. A regular workman does the same thing inside a job: he keeps pushing too, except he hopes it will eventually pay off, a promotion, a house, a better life. This hope is often just a comfortable lie. Sisyphus, who expects nothing and still keeps going, is actually more honest than we are. The real question is not whether the effort is worth it, but whether we can stop lying to ourselves about it.

True love is not a biological instinct, emotional attachment, or social conditioning. Biology and science explain the body's drives, but they cannot explain the self that seeks freedom. Love is the inner restlessness to move from ignorance and bondage toward truth and liberation. Religion is not rituals or inherited beliefs but this personal journey of understanding. Freedom—not possession or conformity—is the essence of both love and religion.

Truth cannot be forced upon anyone, but neither should falsehood be entertained. Genuine love is not about preserving relationships at any cost; it is about helping oneself and others break free from illusion, even if that means risking the relationship itself. Spiritual growth begins by questioning conditioning, examining falsehood without bias, and choosing authenticity over comfort. Real relationships are built on the courage to seek freedom, not convenience.

Vedanta reveals that freedom is impossible as long as the ego seeks to preserve itself. Meditation may bring temporary calm, but real transformation begins only when the false sense of individuality dissolves. Whether through devotion or knowledge, every genuine spiritual path culminates in the complete dissolution of the seeker into Truth. Liberation is not the experience of Truth by an individual—it is the end of the individual who wants to experience Truth.

Questioner (Q): Why do we forget?