Relation with Food, study,urge to be seen & How Acharya ji showed it all is just ego’s / ignorance’s play☀️ I often see people posting their fitness routines , and that feels good to see that people are getting aware. In that moment, it becomes a mirror for me. I notice that I too feel the urge to post but then I pause and see the truth of it. What might be a challenge they are courageously conquering, for me is almost like a necessity . I used to have no strong upper body muscles that’s because of Acharya ji’s teachings that things are not gender biased but must be seen on the level of Human requirements. Since 12th Standard it’s been as my body cannot function without working out it’s required for basic things to got smoothly just like eating, sleeping, or studying. The question came remained was: So if I post about it, is it really about the act… or is it coming from a subtle desire to be seen? And then it becomes clear that urge is not of my own .It is just another way the ego seeks nourishment by following blindly what others do. So ,today to uncover ego and with real observation , decided to post about it. On the other hand, I see where my challenges are when I sit to study, I see a completely different movement. The mind refuses to stay still. The moment I begin to immerse myself, something within pulls me away old resentments, past blame, jealousy… or trivial distractions like “let’s have black coffee,” “maybe green tea,” “a biscuit,” “peanut butter bread.” I have lived through bulimia nervosa, and now I can clearly see it was never just about food. As I’ve learned from Acharya Ji, it was the ego’s obsession playing out in different forms. I see how the ego may not be material, but its consequences certainly are. Now, the grip is loosening very, very much. अहंकार 🤡 को भाव देना कम होता जा रहा है। As understanding is arriving I am becoming far less impulsive. And for that, I feel deep gratitude for the gift that Acharya Ji has given us: सतत आत्मवलोकन. It’s not that I don’t fall ,I do. But the intensity has reduced. And I try not to let any experience go waste. I hold onto it as learning: “कृतो स्मर, कृतं स्मर।” I also remember how earlier I was influenced by so many *lokdharmi baba and organizations* all talking about food habits, waking up early, fixed routines. I had become a prey to that whole self-help machinery. When I used to listen Acharya ji on YT Out of curiosity, I searched for the same kind of content from Acharya Ji, and I felt a little odd when I didn’t find it prominently. Then I came across this: *“शरीर एक संसाधन है काम करने के लिए। जब तक काम में सहायक है, ठीक है। इसका गुलाम नहीं बनना है। कसरत खूब करो, पर इसलिए कि इससे काम निकलवा सको—इसे पूजना नहीं है।”* Something clicked. The matter is far deeper than I was thinking. And gradually it became clear why Acharya Ji says: “जब हमारे पास सत्य नहीं होता, तो अहंकार सत्य के नाम पर न जाने क्या-क्या जीवन में ले आता है—और वही अंततः उसके दुख का कारण बन जाता है।” Because the things and people we are trying to bring into our lives with so much expectation— As Acharya ji says उनकी औकात ही नहीं होती कि वो उसे पूरा कर सकें।neither ours to be that ultimate in someone else’s life. Thinking so is just deceiving ourselves and the other. And from there begins deep sorrow. Now it’s like something within is getting cleaned, as if I am being taken out of filth. And that itself brings responsibility. To take our Mission forward. To remain in awareness. And to share Truth not as an achievement, but as a responsibility , for the beauty of how it takes all the clutter away with such simplicity. Like Ram’s squirrel doing whatever is possible, with whatever capacity one has.
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