Acharya Prashant explains that only a person who is free from others can have loving relationships. A true relationship is possible only when one does not really need the other person. To assess the health of a relationship, one must investigate it for dependency—be it physical, psychological, material, or immaterial. This applies to both one's dependency on the other and the other's dependency on oneself. Where there is dependency, there will only be violence, not love. If you need something, you will not allow it its freedom. If it wants to leave, you will not let it go because of your need. This dependency can be very subtle. The good news is that it is possible to relate totally and freely without being dependent. Spirituality or wisdom is not about cutting off links from the world, but about relating completely and fully without being dependent. The main objective is never to relate with the other, but to remain centered in oneself. A relationship with the other comes as a byproduct, a surprise gift. When one is immersed within oneself, one surprisingly finds that the whole universe is a friend. The universe was never the primary preoccupation. Those who are very bothered about the universe, even in a well-meaning way, will find that the universe is not good to them, and they are not good for the universe. Spirituality teaches that if you can take care of yourself, the universe knows how to take care of itself. You yourself are the problem of the world; by taking care of yourself, you address the root issue. The world's problems are created by man's doing, and more doing cannot solve them. The primary objective for a spiritual mind is always to rest with the one innate truth, not the wellness of the world. The secret to joyful relationships is to forget everything about them. When you rest within yourself, the rest will be taken care of, and your relationships will truly blossom.
