What Is My Destiny? How Do I Achieve It?
Questioner: Good evening, sir. My question is somewhat related to your first answer. So, like, Swami Vivekananda Ji has said that you are the creator of your own destiny. Right? Similar things exist in different literature. But, let’s say when we plan out something to achieve, and if we are not able to achieve that, how should we figure out where things went wrong?
Many times, we plan something, thinking that we want to create our destiny. I'll achieve this because I am responsible for this, and I’ll perform my action. But when the results are not according to what we started with, how do we figure out where things went wrong?
Acharya Prashant : Destiny is not achievement and consumption. That’s the assumption you are coming from, friend. Destiny is not about reaching a great place of achievement. That’s how popular culture presents it. That’s not how Swamiji thought of it. Destiny is not about becoming a CEO. Destiny is not about earning that kind of money or clearing an entrance exam or reaching a particular post, or winning an election. That’s not destiny.
Swami Vivekananda came from Vedanta, and in Vedanta, destiny is Niyati, which simply means Mukti, liberation. That alone is destiny. So, when he said that you decide your destiny, he simply meant that liberation must be your choice, and as a result of your choice alone, are you liberated.
What happens is that there are all these marketeers and motivators around, and they will tell you success is your destiny. They will tell you becoming big is your destiny or becoming a billionaire is your destiny. So, the word destiny has become conflated with a lot of consumption.
So, I am running a particular race, and I have convinced myself that becoming the winner is my destiny. No, no, no, that’s not the right use of the word 'destiny' when it comes to somebody like Vivekananda. He wouldn’t have ever used the word 'destiny' in the context of achievement.
Do you understand what destiny is? Your destiny and my destiny and the destiny, the shared destiny of entire mankind, is just freedom from our bondages. That’s what destiny is. Okay? And, now you are asking what happens if we fail? Well, destiny means something that is inexorable, something you will necessarily come to.
So, you try again. You anyway have to reach there. The only thing is, how much do you suffer in the process, and how long do you take in the process? You want to reduce the time. You want to reduce the suffering. You have a life to live. You don’t want to reach there only when you are 80. Obviously, you do not want to die without being liberated. You also don’t want to be liberated at the age of 80.
You want to be as free as possible, as soon as possible. Don't you? So, what do you do? You keep trying. You keep looking at yourself as an intelligent being, and you ask yourself, “Where did I go wrong? Where did I falter? I'll be better this time. I'll try again.” Because that's the only thing you can do. That's destiny.
Destiny, you understand? The inviolable thing. You cannot get rid of it. You have to reach there. So, better choose in favour of your destiny. Now, destiny is something that can, at most, keep waiting till eternity. But you can never dismiss it. So, make a choice in the favour of destiny. Bow down to your destiny, surrender to your destiny. If it has to happen, why keep postponing it? Because that postponement is just suffering.
Are you getting it? Destiny is love. Destiny is what each of us craves, is crazy for.
Questioner: So, how do we know whether we are making the right choices to reach the destiny?
Acharya Prashant: You have to ask yourself, “Why are you making that choice? What is the intention of the chooser?” There exists a set of options in front of you. From that set, you put your finger on one thing. What is your intention? And that only you know. That’s for you to honestly declare, “I chose that thing because that thing will illuminate me, clear my inner cobwebs.”
Or you could say, “I chose that thing because it is delicious. It will satisfy my senses for a while.” That intention you know very well. You just have to declare it, means acknowledge it. When you are making a choice, ask yourself, what is it in the chosen object that you have fallen for? Will it bring light to you? Or will it just titillate your taste buds?
Not that difficult to answer that question, right? Even if it can’t be answered, just keep asking this question, “I’m choosing this particular object. That object could be a job, a course, or a person.” Just ask, “I’m choosing this person. What is this person bringing to me?” — Titillation of my taste buds? Or light of wisdom?
And be honest with the answer. We are people who can convince ourselves that a gulab jamun is being chosen because it begins with the same letter as Gita does. So, the gulab jamun must have something of the Gita. ‘G’ for gulab jamun and ‘G’ for Gita. So don’t fool yourself. When you are falling for a gulab jamun, be honest enough to convince yourself, to admit to yourself. To admit to yourself that you have just fallen for the roundness and the juice and the aroma. There is no Gita in the gulab jamun.
