Waiting for the Right Person?
Questioner: Before I start to introduce myself, I just want to say that I've been recently going through your videos. Even the short videos of 10 to 15 seconds, especially the woman empowering ones, have literally touched my heart, and it is really helping me to motivate myself more as a woman — especially as a working woman. So thank you so much Sir, for that.
Acharya Prashant: Welcome.
Questioner: My name is Vrishali, sir. I am 32 years old. I have done BTech in Metallurgy. Now I'm doing online MTech from IIT Hyderabad since last year. This is the first time they have started this online program, and we are the ambassadors of that program. I am also currently working in a central government organization as a Grade B officer.
So my question was since childhood, I have been a more studious type of person, more into books kind of thing. And since I'm working also, being an employee, I'm more into work. I have become a workaholic, like — I'm more into doing a perfection type of job, into micro perfection type. I am doing this.
So now what I can see that I don't have much practical knowledge due to being like this person — not being much into practical things of life; I'm only into studious kinds of things. So now, when I have decided to enjoy my life like that and not be more into working type of thing or studying type of thing, whenever I enjoy my life, I feel like I should work or study. And when I decide to study or work, I think I should enjoy my life. So I am always in this type of dilemma. So I don't know how to move on now.
Acharya Prashant: You'll probably need to explain it a little bit to me. So where exactly is the dilemma? You are working somewhere and there you said you like to be a perfectionist. So, you want to go till the last detail of the task at hand.
Questioner: Yes sir.
Acharya Prashant: And that seems to me a pretty nice thing. Now, where is the problem really?
Questioner: The problem is — now I am finding myself more into work and more into study kind of things, and not more into practical life.
Acharya Prashant: What is practical life? What is this practical life, you say, you are missing?
Questioner: Like, you can say — having friends, enjoying with friends, or taking out family with me and enjoying. That type of life, like that I'm saying.
Acharya Prashant: But then, if you're missing that, that has not really much to do with your affection for your work. That can stand its place, and there's not much that you probably need to change there.
It's one of the big fortunes of life to be able to have work that one can immerse oneself into, that one can really get into and forget about time and the world and other things.
So it's a great thing to have in life — the right work. So, if you have chosen the right kind of work, wonderful. And please do continue with that.
Now about relationships, and hanging out, and chilling out with friends and those things — you see, it's a bit of a matter of chance, whether one would have the physical company of the right people. Because, truly speaking, the right kind of people are not too many. So, you can never be very sure or very insistent that you will have very high-quality people in your life. Whether or not you'll have those people depends to some extent on random luck. It's circumstantial. You do not know.
But one thing you can do for sure — you can get into the company of nice books, nice art, ideas, literature. You can travel a lot.
And would you not call these things practical?
Questioner: Yes, sir.
Acharya Prashant: This is every bit as practical as being with a person in flesh and blood. Right?
Questioner: Yes sir.
Acharya Prashant: So my advice would be — do not perpetually keep waiting for human company. There are other equally effective ways to have company and not feel lonely, and have uplifting company. Right? Further, you see, human beings — you do not know what's there behind and beyond the cover. Right?
Questioner: Yes sir.
Acharya Prashant: Books don't change, and books don't lie. Right? In no way am I undermining the importance of human company. I fully well understand that a human being is a conscious entity, and a book is not conscious in that sense. So obviously we say that if you can get human company — nothing like that. But the chances are sometimes not in our favor.
So then we do not keep waiting. We add value to life in the way we can. And there are tremendous ways to add value to life, to enrich oneself, to challenge oneself. And there is no point sitting and brooding over missing company.
Questioner: Yes sir. Thank you.
