Celibacy and Masturbation

Acharya Prashant

15 min
595 reads
Celibacy and Masturbation
The big thing is not about attaining the big thing. The big thing is about fighting the stuff that keeps you away from the big. That fight is a very real thing and one needs to take that up. That's called love. That's called love. You cannot ever fully completely have it, but it's still worth the fight. And when you plunge yourself into the fight, then you do not care about these small things. This summary has been created by volunteers of the PrashantAdvait Foundation

Questioner: You always talk about people like Chaitanya Mahaprabhu, Swami Vivekananda, Ramakrishna Paramhans Ji, Shankracharya, Buddha. Now one thing which always tingles me like, you always talk about, I'm really in love with all stuff which you say. But the thing about here is like when I was exploring these things, I was kind of high.

Like now I know this, now I know about this, now that, now that. And when I came to Advait, that was the point when the high was over. There's nothing to know like as you said, ‘After the Upanishads, when you know the stuff about Upanishads, there's actually nothing to know. And Upanishads also say that.

When I know all the stuff at that point I was a celibate like ‘not celibate’, sorry I think that's the wrong word. But I was following celibacy, I was a brahmacharya as you said like the one who is in love with Brahm, who don't have to do anything with the body or with the sexual stuff but he's in love with Brahm. That's why, he's not able to get the time and at that time I used to think like I'm that person.

But now as the stuff is over and I have read this thing and if I watch any of your videos, I get the same message: stay unattached and Advait is true and stuff like that. I get the same message either in this way or that way. And this makes me fall again into the stuff about the masturbation thing and this gives me so much clarity that I don't have Mumukshu, I just have a ruchi. I just have an interest, ‘Okay, this is a stuff and you know as Acharya ji says mukti is a great thing to get. So why not get it? If I can get money, cars, Ferrari, I should also have mukti. So that's my interest. That's my ruchi.

I'm not able to get the mumukshu and like the Buddha said, ‘I'm sitting over here. If I don't get that, like the stuff, which I'm finding, I'll die over here, sitting here.’

I'm not getting that stuff. And for that I'm seeking your guidance on how to follow celibacy again. Is meditation the right thing to do right now? Is it the right thing to become celibate again?

Acharya Prashant: What is the question? What are you saying?

Questioner: When I started watching your videos, I became a brahmachari and I watch your videos….

Acharya Prashant: What do you mean by that?

Questioner: I….

Acharya Prashant: Answer my questions. What do you mean by brahmachari? What did you become?

Questioner: Okay. okay. I watched your first video which was about Lord Krishna and from there I…..

Acharya Prashant: You became a brahmachari. What did you mean by that? What were you doing or not doing?

Questioner: I was focused on the stuff Mukti, Moksha and Truth but I was not masturbating.

Acharya Prashant: You're not masturbating. Okay. Then?

Questioner: And after I got bored watching your videos, I started masturbating.

(Both laughs.)

Like this is the simplest way, I can put it out. Sorry for that. I'm not talking about a day. Like, if I watched your videos in the morning and in the evening I messed up a bit. Not like that, like for a long period of time. Like for several months. Yeah, several months would be appropriate. I watched your videos from let's say, January to October; i also read Upanishads, i also read Vivekacūḍāmaṇi.

I did a lot of stuff but I didn't meditate. I did everything else like as you said Gyan Yoga and I did many things, ‘not did’ but I listened many things from you as well as from the other people who teach Advait particularly.

And after that it was over. Now I started masturbating, I had time so I masturbated. So now what comes to my mind is Karthik, (name of the questioner) ‘You didn't meditate, maybe that's the fault.’ you didn't had that thing, like you didn't meditate, maybe that's the fault so now start meditating.

And again, ‘Is it the right thing to do? Because I'm not able to, you know, it was my interest, I was not watching web series, I was watching your videos.

Acharya Prashant: So in the duration, you were watching videos, you didn't masturbate. Then you got bored after a few months and then you started masturbating and now you are saying that you want to start with meditation methods. Is that the position?

Questioner: Nods his head in affirmation.

Acharya Prashant: That is the position, okay. Why is it such a big deal, first of all? Why are we talking about it?

Questioner: Because people say that one should not and I'm also feeling. Like Osho said, whatever you're doing, do it. You don't need to like… these are the stuffs which comes in my mind when I….

Acharya Prashant: You wait. You drop all these big names. You tell me on your own why are we talking about this thing right now? There are so many things to talk of, why are you talking of masturbation?

Questioner: Because I think that there are better things to do which I'm not doing. Like the stuff, you said that these are cheap thrills. You need to go to the biggest thrill, the biggest level of truth where you can get the biggest level of truth.

Acharya Prashant: Then the question has to be the absence of the big, right?

Questioner: Not getting big.

Acharya Prashant: The big thing is not there. So you say, you are going for cheap thrills right? And you're talking so much of the cheap thrills, why are you not talking of the absence of the big thing?

Questioner: Maybe because you say that it can't be attained like you can't do anything to attain it.

Acharya Prashant: You cannot do anything to…?

Questioner: Attain it, as you say.

Acharya Prashant: Oh, the big thing is not about attaining the big thing. The big thing is about fighting the stuff that keeps you away from the big. That fight is a very real thing and one needs to take that up.

Questioner: But if I can't get it, why should I fight? If you're saying, ’Jo paaya nahi jaa sakta, use experience nahi kia jaa sakta….

Acharya Prashant: That's called love. That's called love. You cannot ever fully completely have it, but it's still worth the fight. And when you plunge yourself into the fight, then you do not care about these small things. Mark my words. I'm not saying these small things will altogether stop. What I'm saying is that you'll not care so much about them that you start raising them as the most important thing in your life when you are in a discussion like this.

To me, it's as good as asking, "Sir, I pick my nose once too often. What do I do about it? Or my hair has a lot of dandruff. What do I do about it? You pick your nose many times a day. Why should I care? There is another organ dangling in your body. You play with it two times a day. Why do I care?

What's the big deal? The thing is when you are in the right endeavor, then such things stop mattering to you. And I said stop mattering. I didn't say such things stop. They will continue because you have a chimpanzee's body. And we very well know that monkeys do masturbate. There are many species who do that. So that's there in your biological self and it will take quite a while before you are freed of your biological self.

Till that time you will continue to behave like the monkey and masturbating is a part of being a monkey. Are you getting it?

So you will stop caring and when you stop caring, you often find that you also stop caring to do it. When you stop caring for masturbation as if it's such a huge thing. Then often it happens that you also stop caring to masturbate. Because it's not a big deal. When it's not a big deal then it stops being very enchanting. Why do you go towards that activity of masturbation? Because there is a certain attraction or charm in it. Right?

That same charm is making you raise this question. Don't you see? This question is in a sense coming from the same point your masturbation comes. When you masturbate on your bed or wherever. You think masturbation is important, therefore you masturbate. Right?

Right now again you think masturbation is very important. That's why you're asking this question. You have to take up the big fight in such a complete way that you stop thinking that masturbation is important. When it is no more important, then often you find that it is no more important to even do it. Still a bit of it might remain and then you shouldn't care much about it.

But please do not use my words as license to indulge in sexual excesses. Right? Give yourself up to the right thing and you will forget all about these cheap titillations. And if some part of that still remains, do not worry much about it. What can you do? You are a monkey. The monkey has a penis. You are born with it. Huh? Are you getting it? Remember how much importance can one give to picking his nose? Yes?

Questioner: One last question. Maybe you can answer this together like I have two last questions. The first question is as you said it's about love. You are not in love, that's why you're asking about masturbation, not about the truth. That's why you even need to meditate to get to the truth. If you are in love then that love is enough. That's what you say.

So if someone doesn't have love then what can he do? I'm thinking maybe I don't have love. So now what should I do?

And the second question is as you talk about big personalities like Chaitanya Mahaprabhu, Swami Vivekanada. So my question is that those big personalities suggested some methods like one of them says to do the bhajan to take God's name, and one of them opened up the whole stuff about yoga bhakti, yoga gyan and this and that, everything.

And they also prescribed many methods like do this, do this. So why don't you talk about those things which they say? Like as they said, ‘Chant god's name or they say do meditation like someone said. I'm not taking the name.

And how can I fall in love if I'm not. As you say, if I'm talking about masturbation, that's why I don't have love.

I mean like masturbation is more important.

Acharya Prashant: What again is the question?

Questioner: What should someone do if one doesn't have love?

Acharya Prashant: First thing, keep it short. Love is lost in the vast spread of trivia. So keep it short.

What can someone do if he doesn't have love? Suffer. That's a good thing to begin with. Go to people who know love and burn in jealousy. See what you're missing out on. Sounds ridiculous, this answer. Huh? A spiritual teacher is advocating jealousy. Yes, I am.

Questioner: That sounds good to me because nowadays the famous spiritual masters also say that do the satsang, be with the people whom you want to be like and the traits will get transferred.

Acharya Prashant: No, the traits don't get transferred. Something within you awakens. It is within you. It does not come to you via transfer.

Questioner: Love is there in me.

Acharya Prashant: Obviously, it is there but it is hidden beneath a pile of, maybe, porn magazines or something.

(Laughter)

Questioner: There are, you know, modern things nowadays. People don't use magazines. And the last question, why don't you talk about the other things which great personalities say like chanting all day, meditating. If I talk about my mom, she doesn't take as much name. She is like..let's take a random god, she doesn't take his name….

Acharya Prashant: All these great names you're talking of, did they consult each other before they said what they did?

Questioner: Okay. okay. But Swami Vivekananda…but one of them consulted their guru and he prescribed to do that or this.

Acharya Prashant: Consulting someone is one thing. Learning from someone is one thing. But to take the same path as someone else did is a totally different thing.

Questioner: Okay.

Acharya Prashant: What exactly do you want me to do? You want me to tell you the same things that other people have said before me?

Questioner: No. I want you to tell something because you are saying the problem is because of this and we have to leave this. But what should I do? What should I do? Like after watching each and every video of yours, like I also have some of your courses and even after watching the courses very attentively, very attentively even with a diary and a pen I write all the things which you say. After that still this question comes. Okay. So now, what should I do? What should I do?

Acharya Prashant: You are in a jungle. You are stuck and you have blindfolds on. And you are stumbling from here to there. Even the jackals are laughing at you. Nobody even wants to kill you because they are having such a good time just looking at you.

Imagine a lion giving out a huge guffaw and then someone comes and releases your blindfold and then you're asking what should I do? What should I do? What should I do?

Now there is the sun and now there is the light here in your eyes. You still require someone to tell you what to do. That's what Neti Neti is. It removes the blindfolds and thereafter it's an insult if you still need to be told what to do.

Questioner: Basically I can do anything.

Acharya Prashant: That's what freedom is all about. Not that you can do anything. Freedom is about now being able to do the right thing because you can now see. Vedanta does not impose itself upon you. It leaves you free. It does not even ask you to carry Vedanta with yourself.

Vedanta says be liberated and forget everything including Vedanta. Be liberated. That's all. But you're asking, ‘What will I do after liberation? What will I do after I gain eyesight?’ You decide what you will do. Why should somebody interfere? Vedanta is the height of liberalism. You decide but you like to be told, you like to be handheld. Huh?

Some heavenly teacher should come and show you the way. You see, you should dance like this. You shave your head and start dancing. Now you are happy. I have been given something to do. Somebody comes and says you give up your clothes and walk around like the crow. Crowing your way into enlightenment and now you are happy. I have been told something to do.

Vedanta is for real people who do not like to be told what to do. Vedanta is for strong people. To use a sexist phrase, Vedanta is for real men. And all the other so-called spiritual thrills are for boys. Vedanta is only for the men.

Now I'll be angering a lot of my fellow ladies. So advance apologies. When I say men, I refer to Purush, pure consciousness. And that pure consciousness is potentially there in women as well. So when I say Vedanta is for men, I have actually said Vedanta is for real men and real women.

I cringe. Why do I have to explain every time? It's as if I'm apologizing. You cannot understand my vocabulary and I have to go on offering an explanation. every time. So this is the last time. After this I won't.

Questioner: Thank you so much.

This article has been created by volunteers of the PrashantAdvait Foundation from transcriptions of sessions by Acharya Prashant
Comments
LIVE Sessions
Experience Transformation Everyday from the Convenience of your Home
Live Bhagavad Gita Sessions with Acharya Prashant
Categories