When trust is belief, it will invite hurt. Live in understanding||Acharya Prashant, with youth(2013)

Acharya Prashant

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When trust is belief, it will invite hurt. Live in understanding||Acharya Prashant, with youth(2013)

Question: Sir, once in a session we were told that there is no unconditional love. So, Sir is there any point of trust in any relationship? Can we trust in any relationship?

Speaker: Was it said that there is nothing called as unconditional love?

Listener: Sir, it was told that even parents don’t love unconditionally.

Speaker: Ahh! This means that what we see around is conditional love. But it was not said that there is nothing called as unconditional love. What is being said is that usually what you see around you is conditional love but was it said that there is no possibility of unconditional love? Is that what was said?

Listener: No.

Speaker: So there is a great difference. If you see disease all around you, that does not mean that there is no possibility of health. It only means that unfortunately we are living amongst people who are diseased, which is alright. Like that may be a case right now.

You said that how it is possible to trust anybody? If there is anything called as unconditional love, how is it possible to trust anybody? Why should you trust? What is the need of trusting? When I am saying something to you, do you need to trust me? Do you need to trust me? Or do you need do understand what I am saying? If you already trust me, will you ever understand what I am saying? You will say that he is a trustworthy person, it is alright. So what is the need to understand? Just accept. You will say that it is coming from my parents or it is coming from my religion, what is the reason to inquire? What is the need to inquire? Just accept. And in this blind acceptance, there can be no understanding. Are you getting it? You do not need to trust. What is trust?

When you say I trust something or somebody what you are saying is-it is this way. Trust is the statement ‘It is this way’.

I trust that the earth is spherical, it is this way. Now this statement, ‘it is this way’ can come from two different ends. One- I really know that it is this way, and the other- I just believe that it is this way. There is a great great difference and you better understand this. ‘I know that it is this way’ and ‘I just believe that it is this way’, are two very different things. Mostly, we do not know. We just believe. That is the root of our trust. Just empty belief, bordering on superstition, just as the ancient man used to believe that it rains because the gods are in the washroom or they are perspiring. He does not know. What can the poor man do? That there are eclipses because some hungry demon wants to eat up the sun and the moon and he had great interest in all this. When there would be the solar eclipse, that day he will not go out and he would be shivering. ‘That the great demon is consuming the sun itself, what is my worth?’. ‘I will be obliterated in a second’. And he is shivering, you know trust! And all of you are harboring the trust of that notion.

Random beliefs, baseless beliefs. ‘I must earn this much of money’; you don’t even know that this is superstition. You laugh at a tribal who feeds milk to a snake, you say that look at the superstitious man, he is feeding milk to the snake. You are equally superstitious. I must be an engineer, I must be an MBA, I must get married, one must earn this much, one must have a lot of respect, this is the way one must live life; all of these are superstitions, but you have great trust in all this without understanding anything. Life is complete only when you have kids, at least two. A complete life of beliefs without understanding. Is there any reason, any base to all this? That is the reason your trust keeps getting hurt.

Reality is not obliged to conform to your beliefs. You keep believing that it rains in January; it will not rain in January. You keep believing that a particular judgment day will come, and God will come down to earth, or earth will go up to God; that will not happen, and your trust will be hurt, and you will live a life of hurt. You keep believing that a great day will come in my life when a savior will descend, or a prince will come, riding on the back of white horse with wings, and a great sword, and a big heart; that will never happen, keep believing. Your trust is going to be hurt because it is baseless. It is not originating from understanding, it is just a superstition.

Why do you want to cultivate superstition? Why don’t you inquire? Why don’t you ask yourself? Why do you believe in such things?’ I must be attractive’. Why? Are you a Barbie doll? Do you have to be sold? Why exactly? Give me a reason. I must do this and that, why? Sometimes just stop and ask yourself- but why? And you will be amused, you will laugh. You will say that so stupid, everybody is doing stuff without understanding. Why? Everybody is doing stuff without having any notion of its reality. Of course, you cant trust. Inquire, ask, know, be certain, come to the fact, the reality, and then your trust cannot be broken. Right? Otherwise you will keep getting hurt, and you will feel very very bad. Anybody who lives a life based on beliefs is bound to suffer. I don’t want you to suffer. We all deserve joy and that will not come if your mind is full of stupid beliefs. ‘Being a man I must lead this kind of life’. ‘I must be a bread winner’. ‘Oh! I am a woman’. ‘Family must be my first priority’. Why? Why exactly. ‘One day I have to leave my parents house, I am a girl’. Why? ‘The man must take care of the woman’, but why? ‘I tie rakhi to my brother, he will take care of me, rakshabandhan’ , but why? Now the brother is six months old and the sister is 18 years old, and she is tying a rakhi. Can you be more stupid than this?

This article has been created by volunteers of the PrashantAdvait Foundation from transcriptions of sessions by Acharya Prashant
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