How Will You Have a Fairy-Tale Affair? || AP Neem Candies

Acharya Prashant: Had you been completely broken from the inside then there would have been nobody left inside to experience the hurt. What you call as the inside is just the ego inside and the ego is a very magical thing. It becomes stronger when it gets hurt. It is not as if it loses its power when it gets hurt — the more you hurt it, the more strength it gathers. So, first of all, please understand that you have a lot inside that has only become more cemented, more solidified after this episode. Had you been really empty from the inside, who would have received the hurt?

The arrow hits you only when you block the arrow, otherwise, it goes past you. What is it within you that is blocking the happening? You are hurt because you do not like what is happening; your resistance is hurting you. An arrow comes to you, you obstruct it with your hand and it is the obstruction that you offer that pierces your hand. If you do not offer any obstruction to the arrow, the arrow just passes by. Why are you obstructing the happening? The fellow has moved on and the population of the world is eight billion, but he is with another girl. Now, why are you begging after him? What will you get from him — crumbs of love? Do you want love as a donation, as charity? And even if that is given to you, would that satisfy you? And if he was so dear to you, why was there not much compatibility, why did the breakup happen? And if you are you and he is what he is, then won’t the breakup happen again?

You insist on remaining who you are, that is why you are hurt. You insist on remaining who you are, that is why you want the guy back. But if you insist on remaining who you are, you won’t be able to retain the guy. Are you prepared to really change? Are you prepared to not be the one who experienced that attraction? No, that you do not want to do because probably you have some sweet and happy memories but at least you do not want to be the one who is experiencing all the suffering and all the hard work. And that is why you have asked this question. You don’t want to be continuously and anymore in misery. If you do not want to be any more in misery, stop being who you are. You have seen the consequences of who you are and still, you do not want to wake up. Do you know who you are? You are the one who will accept this guy back if he comes back into your life. Do you know who you are? You are the one who will again have a quarrel with this guy. Do you know who you are? You are the one who will again have a breakup and will again shed tears when the guy goes away. Do you want to remain caught in this cycle? Please, do not remain caught in this cycle. Guys come and go, there is nobody more important than your own peace. You do not want a person so he may cause you disturbance.

When you want a person, you actually want peace and contentment through that person. Or, do you invite a person into your life so that he may harass you? Why do you open your doors to somebody? Because that person promises to be the vehicle of contentment and peace. You very well know what you open your doors to, are you opening your doors to contentment? Contentment is more valuable than any relationship. Relationships are a medium, contentment is the end. Relationships are mere mediums, they are like roads that must lead to contentment. They must contain contentment. If there is no contentment in the relationship, why do you want that relationship?

The quality of your love depends on the quality of your life. Your love affair cannot be a sublime thing if your life is mired in littleness. We all want our love affairs to be fairy tales and we don’t look at our lives. We are little people, afraid, desirous, ambitious, suspicious — that is how we live. Now, how can you have a fairy tale love affair?

show_less