Freedom begins with a 'No' || Acharya Prashant, with youth (2013)
Speaker: Karan has asked that he is unable to say ‘No’ and that often lands him in trouble, gives him a lot of problems. Are there others who face this problem?
Listeners: Yes.
Speaker: Alright, so this question then comes from all of us. Let’s understand this question. I am unable to say ‘No’. Now why I am unable to say no? Obviously, there is some fear that holds me back. If I say ‘No’, then obviously such and such will feel offended, if I say ‘No’ something may happen, if I say ‘No’ I may lose a relationship, if I say ‘No’ the other person may harm me.
Some kind of fear is essential. So put your mind on this clearly. Firstly, that the inability to say ‘No’ is fundamentally a fear in the mind. The mind thinks it has something to lose if it says ‘No’. Go into this. See whether this is a fact for you. Are you getting this? Otherwise, why would you not say ‘No’? And there are so many things that we must say ‘No’ to.
And you are very right that so many of our problems come because of our inability to say ‘No’. We get carried away. The crowd takes us along. We are unable to say ‘No’. External forces, external situations keep imposing their authority on us and we are unable to say ‘No’, we are unable to offer any resistance. A wave comes and sweeps us off our feet. Right? It’s painful and we don’t like it and at the same time we find ourselves unable to say ‘No’.
