Beware of her || Acharya Prashant, on ‘Lazarus and his beloved’ by Khalil Gibran (2015)

Acharya Prashant

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Beware of her || Acharya Prashant, on ‘Lazarus and his beloved’ by Khalil Gibran (2015)

Acharya Prashant (AP): What does ‘the woman’ indicate here? ‘Woman’ indicates here that part of your mind that cares only about the physical, which knows nothing of the subtle.

So, suppose you have to reach the clarity session at 8:45, and it is January and extremely cold, and some part of your mind says, "It is so cold I have to take care of my body; how can I go? Plus, it is foggy; I might meet an accident." Now, this voice from within you is your inner woman. She cares nothing about God; she cares only about your body.

This inner voice is the inner woman. She is saying, "Forget about the session; take care of your body. It might be cold, and you might meet an accident; you might be physically hurt." This is the inner woman. Every living being has a man and a woman inside. You all do have a woman, right? The woman, after a couple of hours, will start saying, "It's time to sleep; it's time to sleep." That's Mother and Martha for you.

Even at this place, if you are interested in this and that general sexual rubbish, then it is your inner woman. She has no regard for the fact that something godly is happening. All she wants is something bodily. That's the woman for you. And this entire play is a slab upon the face of this inner woman, who has no concern for Jesus, no concern for God, and no concern for the inner aspirations of Lazarus. She only has concern for the physical, and that's what she will do.

You may have a mother who might say, "No, no, do not go to the session; it is too cold." Or you may have a lover who may tempt you away from a clarity session. “Let's just steal away into the dark and get five minutes of cosy time for the two of us” — that's Martha. Too bad. That's your inner woman.

This morning I was talking about how your body takes you away from what is happening here. Your inner woman is so obsessed with the body but she knows nothing but the body. Comes in Lazarus, and he has not had any food since three days, right? And here you have the sisters talking about the loom and the linen. See, how different their concerns and priorities are.

You want to point out who these women are when you go back from here, just see how people react. There will be people who will ask, “Where had you gone?” Now, this is a woman, all that she is concerned about is the place, space. Then there will be another voice asking, “For how long had you been away?” There's another woman, all she's concerned about is time. Then there will be somebody who would ask, “So, how much did you pay?” There's another woman, all she's concerned about is material.

And then there might be an inner man who would ask, “So, what did you learn? Whom did you meet?” This is not a woman. See, how the woman is dominating. It doesn't matter to her that right in front of her, Lazarus might be talking. All she wants is some physical comfort.

Questioner (Q): Acharya Ji, why did you say that Lazarus can never be a female character?

AP: It's not a question of gender. It's a question of the inner man and the inner woman. You may have a situation where the wife is Lazarus, and the husband is all the time inquiring about her physical well-being. Now, the husband is the mother, and the wife is Lazarus, and you have so many examples that way also. The wife may be very eager to be here.

For example, we have our girl students; they come over, and their fathers there are dying of apprehension. Now the father is playing the role of the mother, and the girl is playing the role of Lazarus. It's not a question of gender. But even in terms of gender, you must inquire why all the wise men of India call this physical part of your mind as Prakriti and why they gave the name Purush to the detached observer of it all — that you must ask.

You must ask why a man like Khalil Gibran created these debauched creatures as females and not as men. Why didn't he say, “Mad woman?” The mad one has to be a man. That madness rarely overtakes women because they are so deeply rooted in their bodies that it's not possible for them to experience this heavenly madness.

The first thing that the madman would do is roam naked on the streets. And the woman is conditioned that her body is her biggest asset. How will she roam naked? And how can you be a mad one if you are all the time wondering whether your clothes are all right or not? What kind of mad one is this?

Lazarus has gone three days without food. And if the female cannot go three days without shampoo, how will she talk to God? The man can go three days without food. The woman can't go three days without a shampoo. That's the problem. With such a body-centric mind, it becomes difficult for the female, not impossible, obviously not, but more difficult than the male. Partly her biological foundations are responsible, and partly the conditioning that society gives her.

Now, you imagine what if Lazarus were a woman. Now Lazarus is going, and Lazarus is a woman. And Lazarus is going running towards the hills. And suddenly, she gets an ankle sprain. Or Lazarus is going running towards the hills, and suddenly her pants are torn. Now, what happens? She is dying of shame. God is forgotten. Shame takes over.

“What if somebody is peeping at my undergarments? It's such an important matter. Life and death, enlightenment and liberation do not matter. What matters is whether somebody is peeping at my panties.” The question that deserves to be asked is: “When you are so careful and obsessed with everything related to your body, how will you ever understand Lazarus?”

He is not talking of bodily things. How will you understand Lazarus? And the unfortunate part is, you think that this is your strength. You think that your whole worth is because of your body. And you exploit your body to enhance your worth, don't you? That's the punishment then that you get. You will never understand Lazarus. Lazarus will never belong to you because he belongs to Truth. Yes, feeble, unworthy men will come to you; men of the body — only they will come to you.

Lazarus cannot love a Martha, or can he? Now Martha may keep wondering, “Why is Lazarus not responding to me? Why has he become so insensitive?” Why are you Martha? That's a question that you should never ask — “Why the hell am I Martha? Why can't I be Mary Magdalene? Would Jesus be found as a Mary or a Martha?”

Now, you want to remain a Martha, and yet you want Jesus by your side. Would it ever happen? You will only get crawling insects by your side who would crawl all over your body and tickle you. But that's often what most women aspire for — insects who can tickle my body. Don't call them lovers; call them ticklers.

You don't want a man of heart. You want a man of stomach and penis. And you think the stomach can lead to his heart, right? So, you will cook good food, and you will get him. Really? Try. Try it with Lazarus. Mother had cooked really tasty food. Could she hold him? That's your punishment. Keep trying all your tactics. You won't be able to hold Lazarus. You have insects called ticks and mites. You may as well have insects called ticklers. Do you want ticks?

Rare is the woman who loves a lover of Truth. Rare is a woman who would say to a man, “Your first lover must be God; I come second.” The woman always wants to be number one, always. And this is the height of arrogance — to not cede space even for the Truth. And we are not talking of wives here. We are talking of the inner woman.

The husband also demands the same thing. He says, "My wife should be loyal to me." Rare is the husband who would say that the wife's first husband is God, and I am just the second one. And the first husband has the first right over her. Rare is the husband who would say this. And then, all that the husband can get is the wife's body. If you really love your wife, you tell her, "I am just a secondary husband. The real husband is somebody else." Be devoted to him.

And if the wife really loves the husband, she will tell him, "Your real beloved is somebody else. Go to him first. And after that, if you get some time, then come to me." The wife would say, "No, no, no, forget the Truth. Stay with me. Lie down by my side and tickle me. After all, you are my husband." And the husband would say, "No, forget the Truth. You are my wife. Go and cook some food."

If you really love your husband, then you must first know real love. And if you really love your husband, you cannot be Mrs Tiwari or Mrs Agarwal, you have to be Mrs God first. But husbands are jealous even of God. They will say, "From where has this nuisance come? Who is this God? I will file a case against him. He is stealing away my wife. You belong only to me. If that God fellow touches you, I will sue him. And let's get a DNA test done on Cuckoo (implying the child). Maybe God has fathered him too badly.”

Be cautious of this urge towards the material. It will show up in various, various ways. Various ways — you want money, that is that urge; you want somebody's body, that is that urge; you're obsessed with food; you're obsessed with sleeping; you can't do without comfort — all of this is that same urge towards the material. Look at the contempt with which Khalil Gibran has portrayed these women; there's sheer humiliation and contempt. Learn a lesson.

This is also the humiliation that you should keep for your own inner woman. When she raises her voice, slap her hard. She will say, "Forget the session, let's go and sleep," slap her hard. Slap her like Gibran. When she says, "Let's have a little bit of Cuckoo in the dark," slap her hard, really hard. Slap her so hard that her horns fall off. Now she can't be horny anymore.

Have you heard of the thing regarding the horns of the hare? Have you not heard? The hare grew horns, but when it was inquired, the horns vanished because there were never any horns, really. The same is the case with horniness. When you inquire, it vanishes. Thoughts, too, are material. If you are obsessed with thoughts, you are another Martha. Thoughts and memories are very material. There is nothing spiritual about them.

There is a song devoted to Lazarus. Have you heard of it? "Kaun kisi ko rokh saka, shayad tu ek deewana hai, Tod ke pinjara ek na ek din, panchi ko ud jana hai. " Try hard; try as hard as you can. The inner Lazarus will fly away. It won't rest till it finds the Truth. Your body may plot against it, your mind may conspire against it, yet your heart will reach where it has to be. Gibran — the compassionate.

What, you want to take a ten-minute calling break? Do you want to call your homes? Do you want to tell them that you just met Lazarus? You'll hear a pressure cooker whistle in the background, "Are you feeling cold? Did he give you food or not? That bearded one is far away, right? Leave my daughter, please!" All Marthas, all mothers — enemies of God.

Be careful. So many of you are at that age where you form relationships with the other gender. Have you seen what happens? One of us says, “I become very caring towards the girls I get associated with.” What is this care? “Why are you taking an auto rickshaw? Let me drop you in my car.” What are you caring for? Her body? That's all that you know. That's your definition of care, right? Or do you mean spiritual liberation when you say ‘care’? And there would be another couple where the girl would become very particular about what the boyfriend is eating. “Take a little more; eat a little more.” Why are you sinking him? Why? Why are you making him feel again and again that he's a body?

The man's definition of care is that the woman should not be raped. The woman's definition of care is that the man should not lose weight. This is your definition of mutual love, right? When the boy says, "I care for the girl," all he means is that now it is 9 pm and I'll drop you home, I'll not let you take an auto rickshaw. And the woman says she cares; she means that I'll bring you some pickles and some good food and some fresh milk, so that you remain fit. What is this? That is the reason why often people marry.

The man would say, "I need somebody to run my house." The woman would say, "I need somebody to take care of me." Martha weds Martha (Listeners laugh), and you call it love, right? You feel so pleased when the voice on the other side says, "Son, you took a bath, didn't you?" You feel somebody is really bothered about you.

Today as Shankaracharya was asking, you take such great care of your husband's flesh and vice-versa. Would you even touch that flesh after he's gone? Why? Then take care of that within him that lives. And it's not flesh that lives. Would you touch his flesh after he's dead? Would you kiss and have intercourse with the flesh? Then there is something else within him that lives, right? Take care of that. If you really love, then take care of that. Don't act like the mother. Don't just keep stuffing food in the name of love. And that shows up in so many ways.

Right now, if I tell you that the left side of this body is paining, at least four or five would come over — "Can I do a little bit of massage? Here is the pain reliever." You are so concerned about my body. All of you are mothers. But you know nothing about what aches my heart. You know nothing about what I really want. Towards that, you are totally insensitive, even cruel.

But when it comes to serving me food, then you are so eager. Just like mothers, right? Shortly, he'll lay out the dinner, and then you will so quickly, "Sir, will you have some water? Here is a little more pickle." What will sir do with a pickle? "Sir, one more roti?" What will I do with that? Can't I get up and take it? But that which I really want, that you will never do. That you will avoid and block.

So, do you think you are doing me any good by serving me food and eating out my heart? How does that sound? Picture that. You are filling somebody's stomach and gouging out his heart. That's what you do to me. That's what most lovers do to their loved ones. Fathers are really caring, right? Motherly fathers.

All of you, do you know how much you are being missed? There would be people who would be calling you, and your number is unreachable. And your seat at the dinner table must be vacant right now. Your loved ones must be really missing you. Feeling missed?

Q: It's already vacant for the last two days.

AP: I am sure some of you have tried desperately for the signal towers. Last time somebody almost jumped down this edge hoping that the signal might be better there. Love and care — mother is calling — lentils must not be overcooked.

You will not even know when all this will become a habit with you. You will not even know when you will lose all sense of what Truth and love really are. You will not even know when you would really mix and conflate these two up. One day you will find that your own definition of love has become this — ‘Kuchiku’ (an utterance expressing fondness). One day you will find that you are telling your wife that you have not cooked the food rightly, so you don't love me.

You will not know how it seizes control of you. One day you will find yourself telling your lover, "Had you loved me, wouldn't you have brought me a heavier necklace?" You will find that. "Had you loved me, had you not given me Cuckoo's sister, Cuckoo feels so lonely." This will become your definition of love. It takes a sneaking, crawling entry into your mind. It doesn't warn you. Very surreptitiously, it crawls in and takes control. Might have already taken control, I don't know; you have to find out.

“If you love me, then the two of us should sleep together.” And you would put this forth with so much conviction. And when somebody would tell you the opposite, then you would feel he is talking in an alien language. You won't be able to understand. "How can there be love without sleeping together?" "Besides, from where will Cuckoo's sister come if we don't sleep together?"

When Lazarus says that he loves his beloved, then does that beloved come to prepare his bed? Does he? Does that beloved come to embrace Lazarus? Does that beloved serve him warm food? Know what is the real meaning of love. It has nothing to do with warm food or dropping somebody home or buying somebody clothes.

When Meera says she loves Krishna, does Krishna come to marry her? Then why have you confused these two things? What is the relationship between love and marriage? But you can't even conceive that there can be love sans marriage. It sounds so unjustified. You feel cheated. “Oh, I loved but couldn't bring it to marriage; It's a defeat.”

Lazarus and his beloved know what love really means, and know how stupid the mothers and the Marthas are. They don't know any love. They don't love you. In fact, they can only prevent you from meeting your real love, as they did to Lazarus.

This article has been created by volunteers of the PrashantAdvait Foundation from transcriptions of sessions by Acharya Prashant.
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