Take care of yourself, and you have taken care of the kids. When the kids see a radiant mother, a radiant father, their darkness disappears. Be first of all concerned about discovering your own radiance. If you have nothing but darkness, all that your kids would get from you is darkness.
But strange is our situation. Preserving our darkness, we want to bring light to our kids. That is an impossibility. That is never going to happen. That is why almost all parents have always failed: they want to bring that to the kids which they themselves do not have. That cannot happen.