Fear is the influence of others || Acharya Prashant, with youth (2013)
Speaker: How many students are sitting here? Around eighty, ninety, some number. I said to all of you to get up and ask your question. Who is the one who displays courage and instantly gets up and asks me a question? Who is the one?Listeners (everyone): Aviral (The one who asked the question) .Speaker: Who is actually not afraid?Listeners (everyone): Aviral *(Again the one who asked the question).*Speaker: Are you afraid right now?Listener (named Aviral): No, Sir.
Speaker: This is an action, that you are speaking something. Your throat is producing the sound wave, which merely is the action; everything else is just the thought. The action is this much that you get up and your throat produces some waves, this is the real action. Would be afraid of doing this action in a vacant room? Is there anybody here who is afraid of speaking in a vacant room? Anybody who is afraid of speaking in front of the mirror? No.First thing is that fear is the thought. The second thing is that thought is of the others. And who are the others out here? You all. So, you all are the ones who are terrifying him. It is obvious that he is afraid of nobody, but you. This is not just his story, which is the story of each single one of us. We are afraid of the others who are around us and for most of us; the others are the members of the family, friends and society. Are you getting it? First of all there is no fear in the action. When action prevails, there is no fear. There is action before the fear. In the think of the action, there is no fear. So, fear is the thought.Second thing is that thought is of others. Why must the thought of others make one afraid? It is strange. Is there any need to be afraid, when the thought of others arises? But surely, it terrifies us. Why does it terrify us? There is a reason. The reason is that there is a lot that he has taken from you. He is scared that what can be taken from you, can be taken away also. So, he is afraid. What he has taken from you is not his own, but a borrowed thing, and it can be taken away by you because it comes from you. Now, who is smart enough to tell me that what is it that he has taken from you.Listener 1: Respect.Speaker: Good. Risabh says, ‘respect’. Respect is that what he has taken from us, and it can be taken back by us. What else he has taken from you?Listener 2: Affection.Speaker: Affection. Good. A sense of acceptance. Whatever he has borrowed from you, will be taken back by you. And remember it is not just his story. This is the story of each one of us.Listener: Social Relationships.Speaker: Could I say that his sense of being in the society comes from the acceptance of others? What else he has taken from you? Now I will change the question. Is there anything that he has which he has not taken from the others? I had asked what all he has taken from you. Is there anything with you in this mind, that you have not taken from others? Is there anything that is purely your own?Listener 3: Thoughts.Speaker: Thoughts. Tell me a single thought that is really your own.Listener 4: Fear.Speaker: Fear itself comes from outside, so how can the thought of fear be yours? Is there anything in your mind which is yours and not coming from outside? Is there anything in your mind which you have not taken from others?Listener 5: Confidence.Speaker: I can give you a lot of confidence and I can also take it back. Confidence is so situational. In front of one particular fellow, you start feeling confident. In front of another, you do not feel confident. What is innate about it? An easy question paper comes, and you feel confident. A hard question paper comes, and your confidence is gone. Is confidence yours or it is the function of the question paper? Your confidence is not yours. Is there anything here which does not change with the situation? I am dropping a hint- if it does not change with the situation, then it will be yours, and nobody can take it away.Listener 3: Sir, It is ‘me’.Speaker: What is ‘me’? If it is your body, it can be taken away.Listener 6: Sir, myself, my individuality.Speaker: What is that?Listener: When I first see the question paper, the first thought which comes to my mind, whether the question paper is easy. or difficult, this thought is self.Speaker: What is really yours?Listener 4: Courage.Speaker: Courage? So, closely linked to confidence. Someone comes, motivates you and asks you to be courageous. You start feeling courageous. Have you ever heard a military music-band? They are played to provoke courage. Have you heard Aaalah-Udhal songs?Listener 4: No, Sir.Speaker: When you say courage, do you understand that there can be no courage without fear? If fear comes from outside and there can be no courage without fear, surely courage also comes from outside. Can there be courage if you are not feeling afraid? Do you require courage to stand in front of your parents when you have not stolen anything, not when you are to introduce your girlfriend or boyfriend to your parents? You do not, because you are not afraid.Courage comes into the picture only when you are afraid. Otherwise, what is the use of the courage? Only a scared man requires courage. So, courage cannot be intrinsic. Every single bit of this mind is conditioned. Every thought is conditioned, comes from the outside.Kindly think that you are speaking in French. Kindly think. You cannot, because there is no external source in your past that has brought the knowledge of French to you. Your thought necessarily depends on an external input that has already come to you otherwise, there can be no thought. When everything that you have in mind comes from others, what does that mean in terms of fear? We said that his respect comes from others, his acceptance comes from others, his courage comes from others, and hence he is afraid that it can be taken back. If there comes a situation that everything that we have, has always come from others, then what will be the quality of life? Always fearful. Because whatever you have, has always come from others; some situation, some people, some system, some structure, but it has come from outside. So, you will always be afraid. Never sure. Your life will lack conviction. It will lack that sense of sureness- that I know for myself, and I don’t need to hear from anybody else. Do you understand it?First thing is that fear is not the action, fear is in the thoughts, and thought comes from the others. Second thing is that the thought that terrifies you is about the others. He is afraid of what others will say about him. He is afraid of what others will think about him because you have opened your gates for others. Let us understand this.When somebody comes to you and says that ‘you are brilliant’, you do not go about and ask question, ‘why is everybody saying that I am brilliant?’ You say, ‘I am brilliant, that is why he is saying that I am brilliant’. Somebody comes and says that you are stupid. You might say that why you are calling me stupid. The question is- would you really mind being called stupid, had you not accepted that you are brilliant? Once you have opened the gates to others, once you have accepted from somebody that you are brilliant, when that same person says that you are stupid, you have to accept that as well. Your very identity, your very sense of yourself, all depends upon others. You do not have anything of yours. You have no understanding of your own self. The question, ‘Who am I?’, is going constantly unanswered. Are you getting it?Listeners: Yes, Sir.Speaker: It is only when you feel good when others say good things about you, that you feel bad when others say bad things about you. All the goodness that you know about yourself is only through others. You feel good when you get certificates. Who gave you those certificates?Listeners (everyone): Others.Speaker: You feel proud to belong to a particular nation. Who gave you that nationality?Listeners (everyone): Others.Speaker: Who told you that you belong to a particular religion?Listeners (everyone): Others.Speaker: All that fills up our mind essentially comes from others, and that makes your life a living hell because you will always be fearful. Whenever what you have, will come from others, you will always be afraid because it can always go back. You will have no security. So, the mind will remain afraid. You want to free of fear. Find that out which is not given to you by others and live in that. What is that which is not given to you by others? If you live in that, there is no reason to be afraid. With how many of you, fear is a concern? Raise your hands.*(All listeners raise their hands).*Speaker: Each one of us who experiences fear, must find out what really is his, and when he finds that out, fear is gone. Fear may come but it will remain on the surface. It will not touch you deep. It will not penetrate you deep.What is really our own? Do you think it is an important question?Listeners (everyone): Yes, Sir.Speaker: OK, we should go into it. When I am investigating this question, what am I using? What is really my own? When I am investigating this question, can I investigate it using borrowed facts? When I am investigating what is my own, can I find out using something which is not my own? When I am finding out what is my own, what am I using? The mind, the conditioned mind. If I am using the facts borrowed from others, then am I really finding out? I just believe. When I am using the information, the facts, the beliefs given by others, them am I really finding out? What am I using when I am finding out what is really my own? Am I using beliefs given to me by others? Am I using information, facts given to me by others? What am I using? Who are you finding out? What is the process of finding out?Listener 2: Verification.Speaker: What is the process of verification? How are you verifying? This mind right now is a laboratory. What is it that we are using to find out what is really mine? What are you using?Listener 1: External Information.Speaker: You are looking at external information. If I am looking at you, am I using you? I am looking at external information. What is it that is looking at that external information? You are trying to understand the external information. What is it that is trying to understand?Listener 4: The mind.Speaker: The conditioned mind. Alright. There are eighty of you who are sitting in the room. There is an eighty- first as well who is receiving all the information that I am giving, and who is also getting this question that find out what is really your own. This camera (pointing at the camera placed in front). This camera is receiving all the sound waves that I am emitting. Can it find out what is that is its own? What is the difference between you and the camera? This camera is receiving all the information that I am giving it. Let us say that we can give it all information of the world. We can load it with other information also. All the information of the world can be attached to it, but still it will never be able to find out what we are saying. What is the difference between you and this camera? What is it in you that is missing in this camera?Listener 5: Mind.Speaker: If mind means just a reservoir of information, then this camera has a lot of mind. What is mind? Is it just a recipient of information, or is it more than that?Some listeners: It understands.Speaker: It understands. This understanding is with you, but never with this camera. this camera listens to me so often, so frequently, still it remains so poor. First of all, it never asks me any questions. It keeps receiving information, never objects, and never accepts. If I delete any information from it, it never complains. Nothing happens to it. It has hundreds of GB capacity, that you do not have, but you have understanding. You do not have this much storage capacity, but you have understanding. What is this thing called understanding? This understanding is yours. This camera too has information, but information alone does not help, if you do not understand. This understanding is totally yours, it is innate in you. If you can live in that, then fear will not reach you.Let me give you an example. Something happens, and the fear comes to you because the mind is conditioned to be afraid. At that moment, if you can understand what is going on, then the fear belongs to the mind, not to you. Are you getting it? The mind will be afraid, but you will not be afraid, because you are understanding fear. Understanding means being at a little distance from something. If you are at a little distance from fear, then fear cannot touch you. Are you getting it?Listeners (everyone): Yes, Sir.Speaker: When fear comes, just see that it is just an external influence. Just see that it is the nature of the poor mind to be afraid, and tell the mind not to be afraid. Or just tell him that mind, keep being afraid, but I will not be afraid. ‘Mind, keep being afraid but I will not be afraid, because I understand that you are being afraid’. ‘Mind, you want to live in fear, live in fear, but I will not live in fear’. Fear is of others, fear is mechanical, fear is conditioning. If I understand this, how can I be afraid? Let the mind be afraid. It is the nature of the mind to be afraid, but you understand. Are you afraid right now? (Addressing the questioner). Now, you are smiling! But it is quite possible that a moment later, the fear may again come to you. What will you do then? Understand that surely some thought is arising and every thought is coming from others. To be afraid means to become dependent on others, to become a slave of others. I will not let that happen to me. Let happen it to mind. I will not let that happen to me. Right? Alright!
Excerpted from a ‘Shabd-Yog’ session. Edited for clarity.
