Acharya Prashant explains that the strangest situation arises when someone claims their problem is their inability to change another person. He clarifies that while this may appear as a state of sorrow, it is, in fact, a state of injustice, ego, and exploitation. He illustrates this with examples, such as a wife wanting to change her husband or a husband wanting to change his wife. He questions their authority to demand such change, urging them to first examine their own lives, minds, and knowledge before attempting to alter others. The speaker posits that the fundamental rule is that a person loves no one more than themselves. The love for others is an extension of this self-love, as they are related to the self. Therefore, if one truly wishes to change whom they love, they must begin with themselves, the person they love the most. To claim a desire to change others while being unwilling to change oneself is a form of deception and hypocrisy. Those who do manage to change themselves become like a torch, their light spreading far and wide, illuminating thousands of other lamps and candles without effort. He criticizes the misuse of the metaphor of one lit lamp lighting another. People who are themselves unenlightened ('extinguished candles') try to force change upon others, and when they fail, they blame the other person. The speaker points out that an extinguished candle cannot light another; the first one must already be burning. This is what happens when someone who hasn't transformed themselves tries to transform others. They are misinterpreting the wisdom of the gurus, who taught that a lit lamp should light another, not an extinguished one. Finally, he addresses how this dynamic plays out in families. Parents who are themselves in darkness prevent their children from seeking light from genuine sources like scriptures or saints, insisting that they are the ultimate gurus. They dismiss authentic knowledge as useless and demand their children learn only from them. When these children's lives remain devoid of light, the parents blame them for being worthless, failing to see that their own possessiveness and refusal to let their children seek true knowledge is the root cause of the problem.