A questioner asks about the dilemma of respecting elders whose past actions are not respectable. She questions whether one should respect behavior instead of just age, and if the notion of always respecting elders is correct. Acharya Prashant begins by asking for a definition of respect. He clarifies that talking politely and properly is something one should do unconditionally, even with a criminal, and is not intimately connected to respect. He defines respect as having a genuine appreciation and valuing a person highly. He states that if one clearly sees that a person has very little that can be highly valued, there is no compulsion to accord high importance or value to them. The core of the matter, he explains, is to first know for oneself what is truly valuable. He points out that the questioner's dilemma arises from her own value system, which values social acceptance. She fears being looked down upon if she doesn't respect her elders, which shows she values being liked and accepted by others. Acharya Prashant encourages a deeper inquiry into what is truly valuable in life. He uses the example of kindness, noting that while kindness is a great thing, one must strive to know what real kindness is, not just its superficial appearance. He explains that behavior can be deceptive; one can put on a show of kindness without it arising from a genuine place. He contrasts this with exploitation, which is not respectable. He gives examples of respectable traits, such as the heart to strive against odds for a just cause, the courage to fight challenges, and having conviction and integrity. He emphasizes that one must have a solid, universal standard of values, free from hypocrisy. The same yardstick used to measure one's own worth must be applied to others. The problem with most people is not ignorance, but a lack of integrity and hypocrisy—knowing what is right but not living that way. He advises to have an eye for those who live their life as per their truth and to respect that. Respect, he concludes, is not about token gestures but about getting close to what is worthy to learn from and to rise.
