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Relationships are not 'give and take' || Acharya Prashant, with youth (2013)
Acharya Prashant
1.1K views
12 years ago
Conditioning
Freedom
Relationships
Love
Intelligence
Present Moment
Social Responsibility
Attention
Description

Acharya Prashant explains that society functions as a mutual network of conditioning where everyone is a victim. He clarifies that those who condition others are themselves conditioned and enslaved; therefore, they are not villains but victims of their own lack of awareness. Only a slave attempts to enslave others, whereas a free person values freedom for themselves and everyone else. He suggests that individuals often need to distance themselves from one another to break this cycle of mutual conditioning. Regarding relationships, Acharya Prashant distinguishes between true relating and traditional social bonds. He asserts that true relating happens in the present moment through direct contact and intelligence, rather than being a shadow of the past. Most relationships are based on images, memories, and social responsibilities—such as being respectful to elders—which he describes as lacking love and joy. He emphasizes that looking at someone through the lens of a title, like 'father', prevents one from seeing the actual individual, making real connection impossible. Finally, he rejects the idea that relationships are based on a 'give and take' dynamic, labeling such arrangements as business or trade rather than love. He states that 'give and take' is inherently violent because it involves expectation and the desire to take more than one gives. In contrast, true relating is rooted in attention, presence, and love, where giving is natural and there is no calculation or formal permission required between individuals.